Job Bullshit

I am so angry at myself. This is typical.

I started the babysitting job with the new woman, who I could tell was trouble right away. We talked prior to meeting and she let me know she would be sending me a document with a to-do list for babysitting for her son.

I get this thing and it is 5 pages long and I reviewed it before meeting her. Some was standard, some was bullshit like I've never seen:

Tell him to put his booty down before he eats
If he acts out say " I love you but you can't do that"
When you are out with him and people pay attention to him, thank them for being so nice.

When she interviewed me, her ex-husband was there and we all read the document together. He looked like a man thoroughly embarressed - by his mother. (We've all been there. You know the look).
At one point I asked her what she thought about disciplining by using time out and she said - not yet. I took that in, and she said - What was that? That expression that just went across your face? -

I almost got up and left. I would have had I not needed the job so badly, had the timing not been so perfect.

At any rate, I manage to get the job, and start. The kid is so adorable. The mom - eh.
Long story short, the next morning I was late, which, as was indicated in the document, was not good.Oh no, not at all. I was fifteen minutes behind, and totally apologized. I'm never really sure in these instances, when I find someone irritating and hateful, whether I've been late accidentally, or "accidentally on purpose".

She calls me that evening to ask all sorts of strange questions (Was the baby in the closet? Who did the baby see at the park? Was the baby too much for me to handle?)

Lady, you're whacked. I thought.

Anyhoo. The next day she texts me and asks me - on my day off - What happened to the bear? Why is the bear wet? I just want to know if I can retire it. Thanks!

 I took time getting back to her. I emailed and let her know the bear was fine, etc.

Things continued in this fashion for the next few days - her strange, demanding. Me, trying for polite, professional (outside of the lateness, granted), in a strange situation I wanted to run away from.

Then she called me and told me that while I was nice and she could see I was trying hard it, "wasn't a good fit".

I wound up angry at myself. WHY couldn't I just do whatever it took to make her happy?? I blame myself for other people's bullshit all the time.